crows_roost: (Ashley's Jen)
[personal profile] crows_roost
From February 20th

By the time I was five I had been kidnapped by each of my parents in turn and then left in the custody of my grandparents because neither of my parents were able to care for me. My grandmothers were more mothers than my mother could or would ever be, She and I are very dear friends but role reversal is a long standing part of our relationship.

My Gramma Martha passed away today, after nearly a year in hospice and several months in twilight where she spoke mostly to the Night People (her parents, her husband).

I hadn't seen her in many years but we remained very close. I am her only grandchild.

I had a dream last Friday night. I picked up the ringing telephone, and old heavy one with a handset and rotary dial and all. Martha was speaking, telling me about her day (grocery shopping, making dinner). She didn't seem to hear when I replied but carried on for a while and then was silent. I filled the space with I Love You and I Miss You. More silence followed and I thought she had put down the telephone.

Then she told a many times told story from my childhood. She and my Grampa Al drove up from the City to visit me and my mom and dad when we were living in a little house that had once been a chicken coop, up in New Paltz I think. I was maybe three or four. When the few days visit was over, they said good bye. I kissed and hugged Al, patted his cheek, and said, "You go home now" then turned to Martha Mekul and said, "But you 'tay here"...weeping I told the Martha in the dream that is was okay, she didn't have to 'tay here anymore; she would always be with me no matter what, that I understood that now.
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April 2017

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